Some of your stories had my laughing so hard. I can't even read them all I am crying.

Most bugs don't bother me. I can pick up giant snails and squish them in my bare hands, flick spiders away no problem, stomp on a nest of pill bugs. No worries.

But earwigs. Brrrr.....horrible things. And the thought of one of them climbing into your ear at night. No sleep for me. Here in California where I am temporarily there are SO many of them. It might just be the one little thing that prevents me from moving here. I just looked at one of my new containers on the deck that has been getting chewed on at night. I was expecting to find slugs but instead there were about 30 earwigs in the daisies and they have eaten all the petals off the Brachycome. I might just have to get some sort of nasty poison to deal with them.

And of course another hatred is ticks. The thought of their little head getting stuck inside you....and every one of my gardening friends from Connecticut has had lyme disease. On a field trip last year to the NJ Pine Barrens it had been such a mild winter that the ticks were out of control. I sat on the ground at one point where I thought I would be safe and looked down to my horror saw about 20 ticks just scurrying along the ground. I never jumped so high in my life!

* Posted by: Chelone z6 so. Maine (My Page) on Sat, Jun 21, 03 at 8:28

Ticks are pretty gross, but with (at the time) 3 dogs and 4 cats, I learned to "deal with" them, too. And both of us have had Lyme Disease (good info. on it in the New England gardening forum FAQ, by the way). It was the sickest I think I've ever been... I was just miserable.

Yeah, David, I don't have a problem picking up creepy crawlies or slimy sliders, either. No big deal.

Quick way to get rid of bats in the house you guys: Open all the windows in the room they're in, turn off all the lights, close the door. Put on an outside light and they'll navigate their way out in a matter of 20 minutes. They don't want to be in your home (where there's no food) anymore than you want them in there! Works slick, no need to kill them or cover your head, either. The only reason they buzz you is because they're actually determining how big and how close you are to them. It's a total fantasy that they'll get caught in your hair, they're designed to navigate in the dark with echolocation.

* Posted by: Chris_ont 4-5 Ont (My Page) on Sat, Jun 21, 03 at 17:27

Talk about heeby jeebies!
I was peeling off another section of lawn today (it's an obsession, I know), when a big chunk of sod came away all at once. There was something long and pale and rubbery sticking out of it and my first thought was: RAT!!!!

I flung the chunk of sod in the air in a complete fit of hysteria before my brain could even work out that a random rat tail wasn't likely to be buried under my sod.

Turned out to be the long tap root of a dandelion that came away clean because the soil there is still so damp from the rains we had earlier this month. Duh.

* Posted by: Beanmomma z6 PA (My Page) on Sat, Jun 21, 03 at 19:29

Hysterical thread.

I don't mind most insects and animals. Except.......

Earwigs(they even smell horrible!)and cat droppings(well they smell horrible too)...Yeeech!

* Posted by: Andy_Japan z9 (My Page) on Sun, Jun 22, 03 at 0:26

What about getting the heebie-jeebies when nothing is there, except your imagination ;-)

After summer begins, I often feel a bug crawling up my arm when it's just a n errant thread from my shirt sleeve. Or I see ants when it's just some tea that spilled out of the canister onto the kitchen counter.

Ever slap yourself in the face just because it itched a little?

This will go on for me until well after the first frost--I should be de-traumatized by Christmas ;-)

* Posted by: LisaZone6_MA z6 MA (My Page) on Sun, Jun 22, 03 at 9:09

Andy - I've done the same thing! My DH has a cousin who has a log cabin up in Maine. She owns 80 acres on the Saco River in between Hiram and Denmark. Anyway, I'm most definitely a city girl. My first trip up there was in the dead of summer. Well we ended up staying around 5 days and by the time we left I was actually crying and seriously thought I would have a nervous breakdown. They have some mutant sized country bugs up there!!! Everywhere you sat, a bug crawled away just before your butt hit. Every time you went to put on your shoe, something crawled out of it first. And these things were huge!! We found one beetle - one of those ones with the huge pincher jaws - those jaws could easily have circled my thumb no problem, that's how big it was. Tarantula size spiders that moved like the wind. I'm shuddering just thinking about it again! The night we got home I had nightmares all night. I kept waking up in hysterics imagining bugs crawling over me. I have never gone back there in summer time since. I'll only go in fall after there's been a freeze and the bugs are dead!

* Posted by: march z4 WI (My Page) on Sun, Jun 22, 03 at 9:42

Is there a name of a phobia for dead things? My name and picture should be right next to it! When I was a kid, I would be barefoot 100% of the summer. One day I was walking my bike up a hill and was distracted by something going on at a house. Little did I know that I was walking right onto a freshly runover squirrel! EWWWWWWW IICKKK squishy! My toes right now are curling and recoiling from that traumatic experience! That was over thirty years ago and I still cannot go near anything dead or pieces of animal parts. Hubbie does all of the grocery meat shopping and I must wear a baggie over my hands and use forks to even get raw meat onto the grill. My garden does not get touched if I discover a dead sparrow or baby bird carcass in it. Once again, I must get hubbie to get the shovel. Give me live spiders, snakes, earwigs, slugs! Just don't let me see their cadavers!

* Posted by: dian_OR z8 OR (My Page) on Sun, Jun 22, 03 at 9:45

This thread is hilarious!
With me it's spiders in the house, I'll deal with them if they're anywhere but on the ceiling. If one's on the ceiling, I get my husband to deal with it. I just know I'll miss and it'll fall right on my face. My mom could hardly ever kill spiders, she'd always do the drinking glass and paper thing and take them outdoors, I just knew they were going to come back. I'll never forget the time a nest of them hatched in the house and hundreds of the little spider babies coming down with their parachutes and her frantically running around with the mop trying to get them all smushed.

Another is those long legged things that come in and just fly around near the lights, those get the adrenaline pumping.

One time we had a cricket in our closet. Every night we'd hear it but couldn't find it. My husband finally got sick of it and buck naked went into the closet with a flashlight to try to get it. Him sitting in there with the door closed, in the dark, occasional chirps, a flash of light, the great white hunter. I don't even remember if he got it or it finally moved on. I still chuckle when I think of that.

* Posted by: Marilou z4 IA (My Page) on Sun, Jun 22, 03 at 13:56

I take your stories out into the yard with me and think of them while I'm working. Most of the time this is good, but some of the time this is not so good.

Good: laughing to myself about all the funny stories here! Not so good: wondering what unseen creepy crawly thing I might inadvertently grab/step on/squish next, something I'd never given thought to until reading this thread! :oD

* Posted by: andreap 7b NC (My Page) on Sun, Jun 22, 03 at 14:32

Ever since I had to wrestle with a wolf spider in my home out in the sticks in central PA many years ago, I have never been too afraid of other insects, except, of course, large cockroachy--water beetle types in the house (thank god for the drought last year). Earwigs are really disgusting, but I've found they love to drown in the same beer I put out for the slugs, which I don't mind doing in completely with a sharp stick if I must, whenever I can--better them than my plants!
But to get back to the original post and plants that creep you out, I have huge areas of poison ivy and tree seedlings, some of them a couple feet tall, growing among some azaleas, and just cannot muster up the bravery to deal with all of it. Ah, the blessings of a wet spring season!

* Posted by: akared z5 ID (My Page) on Mon, Jun 23, 03 at 20:52

Okay, have to add mine. I hate spiders! Completely, totally ugggghh. I get the creepy crawlies going past my junipers in the front of the house that have collected spider webs all over them. Its awful to try and weed under them just imagining them in the hair and e My husband thinks I'm a weenie because I make sure he flushes the toilet after he kills a spider and places it there. I mean what if it wasn't really dead and it was really fast???????

* Posted by: babsclare z5OH (My Page) on Mon, Jun 23, 03 at 22:18

Ok that's IT. Stepping on the freshly dead squirrel is just the worst-I'm almost in tears thinking of the sensation- YUCK. What is almost as bad is the SMELL of a deceased squirrel(or fill in any rodent)that is getting a little overripe if you know what I mean-I am grossing myself out!

Andy I freak myself out over a single hair(don't ask me why they are falling out..)that tickles my arm and you keep slapping until you finally realize it just a hair-a slight case of paranoia I presume.

* Posted by: dan_southernPA z6aPA (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 11:50

It takes a lot to gross me out, but --- slugs. Period. And what they can do overnight to a plant. But my revulsion quickly turns to sweet ghoulish revenge by a few deft applications of the salt shaker, or by seeing their piled up corpses the morning after I've sprinkled slug bait around.

* Posted by: dan_southernPA z6aPA (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 12:04

Another one: while snakes do not frighten me, the jump-out-of-your shoes factor is definitely in play when, in the course of puttering about, you are about to step on a six-foot (harmless) black snake that occasionally meanders through the yard. After the echoes of the explosive shriek have died down, the old boy just wanly looks up, figuratively shrugs, and keeps on slowly slithering. Last year he sidled up to my stretched-out garden hose as if to say: "Hey baby, how about you and me ..." (you can fill in the rest)

*Posted by Wild4Gardens 6 PA (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 13:25

Such fun I had to continue it! Why do I read this at lunch time everyday???

I just have to say to MARCH that your entry had me laughing so hard that my coworkers were asking if I was OK! Maybe because I can relate.. when I was about 7 years old, I climbed a tree to look inside a birds nest.. only to find that the nest was abandoned & the babies had hatched and expired or had been raided and the babies half eaten. The sight was so horrible to me and 7 is an impressionable age, mind you... I couldn't eat mashed potatoes until I hit my 30's!!!? HA HA.. don't ask me why, but I just associated the texture and lumps with the vision in the nest!!! So, I completely understand and appreciate your phobia.. as silly as it may seem to some!!! :o )

* Posted by: Chris_ont 4-5 Ont (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 14:59

Last year around this time I kept a small plastic mesh basket on the back step into which I'd conveniently dump the kitchen waste, rather than make the trip to the composter after each meal. The mesh let the scraps dry out, there's no smell and wasn't that oh-so clever of me?

Well, if you recall, last year around this time we had a major earwig infestation up here. When I lifted up this mesh basket at the end of the week, those bugs POURED out of the mesh bottom like water! Hundreds and hundreds of them. Onto my feet.

The bucket went flying, bugs and scraps included and off I went running down the stairs. The neighbors still think I'm batty.

* Posted by: slcdms 7 MS (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 16:25

I guess I am the odd one out here. I don't like frogs. I am ok if I see it, but if it jumps on my foot I will have to have a strong nerve pill. I have to keep it a secret from the little ones in my life because they all want to bring me one when they find out I hate them. I read all the posts to see if anyone else had frogfobia, but saw no one else. I feel sooooooo lonely.
Sandra

* Posted by: Cindy50 z4-5 IL (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 17:00

Earwigs...earwigs...earwigs...I absolutely can't stand them. I can hardly even stand to touch them with the bottom of my shoe to kill them. I've even had dreams (nightmare?) about them.

I used to hate Japanese beetles, but since I started squishing them, it now gives me some kind of perverse pleasure.

Isn't it funny how different people are. I just love frogs.

* Posted by: grrlsmom z5 IL (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 17:00

Sandra - I am with ya! Several years ago at a Girl Scout Leaders Camp weekend, a friend, as a joke, put a very small one in my jacket pocket. I found it immediately after dinner. I screamed "Get it out! Get it out", barfed, and hopped around like a woman possessed until someone thought to check my pockets. Then I got hiccups for an hour. My friends can laugh about it now, but I think it's gonna take a few more years for me. Mercifully, I can LOOK at them with no problem and it didn't bother me when my girls brought them to me - just as long as I didn't have to touch them.

* Posted by: slcdms 7 MS (My Page) on Tue, Jun 24, 03 at 17:05

Now I don't feel so lonely

* Posted by: march z4 WI (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 9:39

Well, I certainly can join in the laughs when I tell that story of the squishy squirrel, but the squeamish terrors still lurk inside me. My best buddy, Lois, has raised motherless squirrels in the past and lets them race around the house while they get stronger to be let go in her woods. Think of me going into her home with these things tooling around like low flying jets! And they are still alive! I am sooooo in need of rodent therapy! 8-(

* Posted by: NancyD 5/6 Roch., NY (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 9:47

For me it's poison ivy. At the sight of anything that slightly resembles it, out comes my weed killer and the poor thing doesn't have a chance. Frogs, rodents, insects don't normally bother me, (I like my little garden frog friend in the back year) but the sight of poison ivy makes my heart pound and my hands clammy. Oh, the agony!

* Posted by: back40jen 5MI (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 11:40

I can relate to your poison ivy phobia. A couple of years ago, I was taking my dog on a hike (yes, the same boxer who eats the soap) and when I didn't see her for a bit, called her, still didn't see her, so when I looked around, found her struggling on the bank of the river, barely holding on and looking terrified. I sprawled on the ground to get her out, and later discovered that I had been laying in a big patch of poison ivy. I had such an awful case of it. It was beyond blisters on my arms, just a constantly oozing mess. I finally went to a doctor. Even now, just the thought of poison ivy makes me shudder.

* Posted by: LisaZone6_MA z6 MA (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 11:56

I don't have any poison ivy thank goodness! A story about a friend of mine tho makes me shudder to think of it. He got married and bought a house in the burbs after having lived in the heart of the city all his life. Not knowing what he was doing, he waded out into the "weeds" on the back of his property with his brand new weed whacker dressed in shorts and a tank. Well the "weeds" turned out to be poison ivy and he was covered head to toe from everything flying around as he weed whacked. He hasn't done that again!

* Posted by: TinaMcG Z5 Chicago (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 15:06

White grubs!!

I haven't eaten bay shrimp since I began gardening.

* Posted by: vivian_MA z6MA (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 16:59

This didn't happen in my garden but it did come after a long hard day of working in the yard when I was relaxing in a hot tub with a few friends. The night was warm...the moon was full...the night sounds were music...I was in double dip heaven...when a kamikaze moth decided to fly straight into my ear and instead of backing out politely proceeded to burrow it's way down my ear canal. I started screaming like a banshee. Took a while for the friends to figure out what the heck was going on. The more they tried to pull it out with tweezers the more it headed the opposite way. It was a long 20 mile ride to the ER with the damn thing beating frantically deep inside my ear. It finally died or exhausted itself at some point while I was waiting to be seen. The last thing the doctor said to me was "Well I hope I got it all out."

* Posted by: TinaMcG Z5 Chicago (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 18:38

Oh Vivian....that makes me think of the most oogy episode of Night Gallery. Remember that show? It was the earwig episode with Lawrence Harvey, probably the creepiest thing I've ever seen on television.

* Posted by: janetgia 5a IA (My Page) on Wed, Jun 25, 03 at 19:12

Heebie-Jeebie Critters:
Ticks Maggots Centipedes and...
JUNE BUGS!!! Oh how I HATE June bugs!!

The garter snakes always startle me, but they don't bother me.

Heebie-Jeebie Plants:
Poison Ivy Wild sumac (we call them "stinky trees" because the saplings STINK) Anything sticky

Heebie-Jeebie Goo:
Rotting animal carcasses Anything slimy

* Posted by: chaos_quilt Ohio z5 (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 10:07

Wow Tina...was just telling my DH about that episode when he asked about earwigs...that was a scary one! And the Twilight Zone episode where the spider in the bathroom keeps coming back a little larger every time it is flushed down the drain...no wonder people are afraid of the things!

My #1 gross-out is grubs...they are disgustingly transparent, with those nasty pincher thingies out front...and they're blind, but will crawl away if you don't squish them, which I can NOT bring myself to do...can cut them in half with my spade if I can push them so far into the dirt that I can't see the actually death act. Slugs are a close number two, but that's what slug bait is for...death from a distance.

I'm not afraid of either of those two creatures, but roaches of any kind make me do the floppy arm dance...e e e Why do people call them "cockroaches" if they are inside the house, but "wood-roaches" when they are outside...like they aren't quite as evil if they are outside???

* Posted by: juspeachy z5NY (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 10:21

I have to say "maggots" from when I was about 5 and found a "poor" dead chipmunk and touched it,it looked so pretty lying there, when I touched it the whole thing started moving and then those things started to pour out from under it, I had no idea what they were I thought they had killed the thing and that they were coming after me, it scared me so bad I went crying to my mom and she told me what they were, but over 40 years later I still hate them. UUUGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!

* Posted by: Beck_WI z5 WI (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 11:29

OK guys and gals.... here goes.
I'm always barefoot when I'm outside. Last week my neighbor wanted me to see her four o'clocks so I walked into her yard, and what did I step on? At first I wasn't sure what it was but it squished under my foot and did not feel good. I jumped back and said "what the hell is that?" I looked closer and it was a baby bird, it didn't even have feathers yet. e ee eeeee Luckily the poor thing was already dead or I would have felt VERY guilty.

A friend of mine was building her house on a wooded lot, the crew left for the day and her father in law decided to stop by to check on them. Somehow he got something in his eye, so he went over to one of the water buckets they had laying around to splash his face, he leaned down, eyes closed and dipped his hands in.... upon the second trip into the bucket he felt something touch his hand. It was a squirrel who had drowned in the bucket.

He was running to his truck as my friend and her dh were pulling in the driveway. He tried to tell them what happened, but all they could get out of him was muttering about buckets and showers. They found the bucket and laughed like loons.

The father in law still says "it's not funny"

* Posted by: deborah1175 Athens Georgia (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 11:34

Chaos quilt, here in Georgia we have "pine bugs" aka "palmetto bugs". Yeah, right!! Giant roaches is what they are, about 4" long. There was one in the building where I work and someone made the statement, "Get a saddle and we can ride that thang." I don't especially care for most of the critters listed, but I will definitely leave the area for one of these prehistoric looking things. I remember my ex-husband raising up in bed one night and turning on the lamp. He yanked down the covers, and there on his hairy leg was one of the things. Needless to say, I spent the rest of the night on the sofa. Yucko, yucko!!

* Posted by: another_hosta_please 6 Coastal MA (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 11:58

Well it's not really a heebie-jeebie, but it's funny garden pest story. We used to have big garden by the woods in the house I grew up in. My mom would always grow our own vegetables. As the the garden got older the timbers sunk in the ground rotted out. The woodchucks would make their way in and enjoy the smorgasboard. My mom would totally freak out. The dog would bark like crazy and woodchucks would happily dine in peace. One day my mom picked up a rock to throw at the woodchuck and scare it away. Totally by accident she beaned it on the head. You guessed it.....dead as a doornail. The neighbors called her "Rambo" for years!

* Posted by: grrlsmom z5 IL (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 12:27

another hosta - loved that story! I had to laugh out loud! Vivian - I may never enjoy the patio at night again! My Mom was working in her veggie garden one hot, sweaty day and smacked and killed a horsefly that was chomping on her leg. That evening, the spot began to swell - and swell and swell some more. When we FINALLY convinced her to go the Dr. 2 days later, it was big, red, and oozing. Dr. lanced it and found the head of the fly driven into her leg. UGGGGH! She learned to shoo them away instead of flattening them. RE: the poison ivy - one of our neighbors back in Peoria had a beautiful bush, turned gorgeous colors in the Fall, just a perfect specimen of whatever. It had a tendency to get really shaggy really quick, so he spent a lot of time trimming and shaping it. He also kept going to the Dr. fighting a skin rash - couldn't seem to control it. You guessed it - some experienced gardener came by and informed him he was spending all his time shaping a poison oak/sumac/something bush! It WAS pretty!

* Posted by: Tannatonk z3 MT (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 12:31

This isn't really a "garden" heebie-jeebie but it does involve some YUKS! and EEKS!! The windshield washer fluid in my car would not squirt out and when I told DH he said "oh the line must be clogged or something... no problem". Anyway he proceeded to disconnect the line and blow in it. Still nothing. So he decides to siphon it with his mouth! Pretty soon he comes running into the house spitting and sputtering, throwing open cupboard doors, gargling with everything under the sink (including bleach!) and basically squealing like a little girl. When he could finally tell me what was happening it turns out that what was clogging my washer fluid hose was a decaying mouse! Fur, bones and who knows what else! It was quite nauseating and DH has not been the same since.

Things in the garden that creep me Out? Grasshoppers and praying mantis!

* Posted by: hengal z5 / Indiana (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 13:21

OMG Tanna! That is sooooo disgusting!

June Bugs!! I HATE them and we have tons of them. I hate the way they fly around my face and get stuck in my hair ---ICK! A couple of weeks ago it was late at night, I was in my pajamas in our room getting ready for bed when I felt something "itchy" on my rear end. When I felt to see what it was - it WAS A JUNE BUG IN MY PAJAMA PANTS ON MY BUTT!!! OMG!! You talk about doing a dance- Geesh - I was rippin those pants off as fast as I could! Needless to say DH was laying in bed holding his sides laughing hysterically at my "bug butt" antics. I still have no idea how that creepy thing got in there! Maybe my butt attracts bugs - I got stung on the "cheek" by a wasp several years ago (thanks alot - like I really NEEDED that cheek to swell to a bigger size than it already was)

* Posted by: LambsEar z7 TX (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 13:25

No one has mentioned scorpions yet. We live in the desert of West Texas and get those little blonde ones. They like to get in the attic and sometimes fall out of the light fixtures, or just creep silently around with their tails up and pincers out. Tarantulas are pretty common here too. It's pretty freaky when you see them crossing the highway in a herd.

* Posted by: mscarlet z5 MA (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 14:29

I remembered another story. I was not actually gardening when it happened but...When I was little my mom started collecting leatherbound first edition books for me. When I married and then divorced I toted those huge boxes of books with me every time I moved. About 9 years ago when I was redoing the cellar in the house that I was in at the time, I took the boxes of books and put them in my garden shed.

After being out there for about a year someone asked me they could borrow one of the books that I had. I went out to the garden shed to check the boxes (I also had boxes of hardcovers that were relatively new) and was opening them and sticking my hand in them. One of the boxes had this cottony feel to it. I thought my son had stuck something in it so I opened it up! I almost had a heart attack right then and there. Peering up at me with beady red eyes was a creature! I screamed and was hopping up and down going nuts. My husband came out and went to see exactly WHAT had been in the box. Whatever it was I had scared the hell out of it and it booked (no pun intended). It appears whatever it was had made a nice soft nest in my box of books. He think it was mice but I am not so sure.

Anyway, now I can not even open any box that is in my garage (which is dirt floored) or anything that has been delivered in a box by UPS or any other delivery service if it has been outside for any length of time (even hours) without putting on my rose thorn gloves, making sure I have shoes on (in case the creature runs out) and putting a hat on so if it jumps it isn't jumping on my head! My husband thinks that I am nuts because as soon as I hear the UPS truck I got outside to meet him so that the box is not left out there unattended! Those little red beady eyes have traumatized me for life!

* Posted by: Tannatonk z3 MT (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 14:56

You guys have me remembering all sorts of things that I thought for sure I had blocked out of my head forever. Here's another one that happened about 8 years ago and we were moving. As we were loading up our bed I found a huge snakeskin under it! And then later that same day I was cleaning the bedroom before we shut the door for the last time and when I took down the ceiling light fixture there was another snake skin!!! How did it get there? I'm so glad we were moving out and not in.

Thanks alot guys. It may take another 10 years to forget about that one. LOL!!!

* Posted by: honaras z4-5 MA (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 15:05

Had to add in my heebie-jeebie tale! haha Keep 'em comin'.

Well, long story short, my apartment was infested with maggots last fall.

I walk out of the *clean, well-cared for* apartment in the morning - all's fine and dandy. I return that night - over 300 maggots crawling all over my floors (carpeting *and* linoleum.) They must've come from the kitchen trashcan (which I'd emptied just 4 days earlier...) but I have no idea how they climbed up the sides, since none of them were anywhere but my floors. I had pick up everything on the floors (magazines, books, shoes, my favorite pair of jeans), try to avoid screaming when I'd see the little f___kers squirming underneath, and squish each and every one with tissues and throw them out. There were 4 under my bed!!!! It still makes me gag. Damn houseflies... Any possible ideas how that happened??

* Posted by: Cindy50 z4-5 IL (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 15:50

Oh my gosh! I forgot June bugs and ticks and leeches and...maggots... I also never equated shrimp with grubs... And I never was particularly afraid of mice... until now!

* Posted by: Veronicastrum z5 IL (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 15:51

Okay guys and gals - I started the first thread by saying that I couldn't stand the feel of Rudbeckia hirta against my bare hands. I want you all to know that last weekend I was pulling 'em bare-handed, because the feel of that hairy rudbeckia was nowhere near as gross as some of these stories!

I have to share my experience with poison ivy. We don't have any on our property. A few summers ago my left ankle started to itch, but it was the height of mosquito season so I didn't think much about it. I have this bad habit of sitting with my left ankle tucked under my leg. Pretty soon, the back of my leg was itching, then it spread from one thigh to the other as I slept. By now I was doing calomine lotion all over, and wearing the same loose skirt every day because I couldn't stand to wear anything touching my legs. Finally I called the nurse and told her how bad the rash was (the skin on my ankles was thickened like leather at this point) and that it looked like poison ivy but I didn't know for sure. She had me come in that afternoon.

The nurse I had spoken with called my name in the waiting room, and as I walked over she said loudly, "Well I'll say you've got bad poison ivy!" Do I need to say that this was before the current patient privacy laws? (And do I need to say that I now have a new doctor?)

Anyhow, I went so far as to retrace my steps for several days before I came down with the rash and never found any poison ivy. My best guess is that one of my dogs wandered off somewhere, got it on his fur and then rubbed on me. And if I ever even remotely suspect I have it again, I will be washing vigorously with Technu!

* Posted by: Betula 7MD (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 16:18

I think we should take a vote on who has the funniest heeby jeeby story to tell.

Actually, these three get my vote:

Lisa's story about the skunk Wild4gardens story about the tick and her husband Veronicastrum's story about the bee and her ahem cleavage

* Posted by: ernie50 z7bGA (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 17:06

I was thinking the same. My favorites are Meadowlark's Mother of all Spiders & Marilou's snake orgy-they must be stopped!LOL. Great visuals.

* Posted by: Storygardener 5/6 central oh (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 18:24

I've noticed a trend here...seems like only women get the garden heebie-jeebies.

Don't men ever get them?

Just wondering...

* Posted by: Jannie z7 LI NY (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 19:29

My friend Angela went out for her Anniversary with DH Jim. She ordered a big salad, it came with cut-up portobello mushrooms, sliced in strips. Jim looked over, said her salad "looks like it has slugs in it," Angela went home in tears, and hasn't been able to eat mushrooms ever since.

* Posted by: another_hosta_please 6 Coastal MA (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 20:03

lmao @jannie's story. That is priceless!

* Posted by: ernie50 z7bGA (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 20:28

Why no, storygardener! We're much too macho and manly to...WHAT WAS THAT!!!;)

* Posted by: bouncingpig Spokane z 4-5 (My Page) on Thu, Jun 26, 03 at 20:56

Here in Spokane we get these horrible spiders that look like a marshmallow after it has been roasted and is about to pop. If you squish them (poor DH gets that job!) they literally explode. Their bodies, not counting legs, are about an inch across! So creepy!!!! I also think those white plastic garden swans sold at K-mart border on giving me the heebie-jeebies, or perhaps just the "tacky-wackys".

* Posted by: grrlsmom z5 IL (My Page) on Fri, Jun 27, 03 at 0:36

E had to share my fav maggot story. And by the way, I vote for another hostas story about her mom and the ground hog. LMAO! Anyway, when our 3 girls were little, they were very competitive about everything. Fixing chicken to go on the grill one night, I noticed there was an odd # of legs - not an absolutely, even, fair #, and thought, uh-oh, another fight! When dh brought them back in, one was gone and I even remarked, oh ya fixed that problem! He just looked at me. 6 wks later, oldest dd room SMELLED. I cleaned and cleaned, ripped apart the closet, everything. But for some reason, I don't remember why, I didn't get under the bed. One afternoon, I heard all the girls in dd rm. screaming their heads off - chicken leg had pretty much walked out from under the bed by itself. Maggots! The kids and friends were freaking, dh was gone, I had to bite the bullet and take of it ALL BY MYSELF. EWWWWWW! We finally figured out cat had snuck up, grabbed it before plate went out to be cooked and carted it under dd bed for a snack and then abandoned it. Thank God, none of the six I have now is interested in people food!

* Posted by: Storygardener 5/6 central oh (My Page) on Fri, Jun 27, 03 at 5:44

Ah, yes, Ernie - that's what I figured...*giggle*.

* Posted by: Wendy_the_Pooh USDA 2003 z5/6 (My Page) on Sun, Jun 29, 03 at 14:57

Today I found this THING growing on my straw...
[Yucky fungus growing in straw] [More yucky fungus growing in straw] [Yes, even more yucky fungus growing in straw]

Eeeeek, I almost touched it!!

Also, my very own dog barf fungus...
[Dried dog barf] [More dried dog barf]

[ o ] RE: Garden Heebie-Jeebies II

* Posted by: jennysrainbow z5 PA (My Page) on Sun, Jun 29, 03 at 17:34

I'm sure I'm not alone in getting that Heebie Jeebie feeling from spiders... Don't know why, but they give me the creeps. After being out in the garden one evening, I came in and saw a hidious, brown, hairy, rather large spider on my sneaker. I shooed it off and proceeded to squish it - only to realize that what I thought were "hairs" on the spider weren't... they were HUNDREDS of it's babies traveling on it's back!!! UGH! They were running all over the floor, up the walls, everywhere. My Heebie Jeebies were multiplied by 100 - literally. Had to get some spray to kill them all. Would have taken all night to track down and squish all the little ones. Gives me the willies just thinking about it.

Great post - love these stories... hysterical! :) Thanks for the laughs.

* Posted by: Veronicastrum z5 IL (My Page) on Mon, Jun 30, 03 at 9:35

THE WEEKEND REPORT:

Friday - Went for a walk through the woods when somebody said, "Oh, there's poison ivy in here!" Yes, I was standing on it! (See my earlier post where I insist there is no poison ivy on my property. Mea culpa.) When I got in the house, I carefully removed my jeans and immediately washed them because the cuffs definitely dragged across the plant. Haven't decided how I will handle the leather work boots I was wearing!

Saturday - Drove downstate to visit a friend and pick up my daughter from camp, so I was safe for the day!

Sunday - worked in the garden most of the day. Took a mid-afternoon break on the porch. As I was running my hand through my hair, I felt a piece of leaf or a seed stuck in my hair, right at the part. Hmm, it was a little stubborn to get it out... Hmm again, what's that crawling on my hand now? EEUW! TICK!

Thank goodness it's Monday!

* Posted by: flytoxin z6a NJ (My Page) on Wed, Jul 2, 03 at 0:06

My story is not so much of an EEUW!!, but incredibly embarrassing. I mulch all my beds with wood chips as we have a tree service. The different variety of chips produce of course different varieties of fungus/mushrooms when they become extremely wet. Well one weekend the significant other's parents came down for a visit after a particularly rainy period. I had not been around the north side of the house for about a week and that area is heavily mulched in a wide swath. As I rounded the house giving them a tour of the various improvements we had made since their last visit we stopped dead in our tracks. There were hundreds of mushrooms, I mean hundreds. All of them the exact same standing there in full glory at complete attention. THEY EACH LOOKED LIKE A COMPLETE SET OF MALE GENITALIA. The flag pole and the two boys. It was a giant sea of white serpents. Have I told you yet that his parents are Baptist ministers? His mother was afraid to walk on the stone path leading through, she kept looking back and forth as though she thought one of them were going to jump out and bite her ankles. So what did the S.O. say to his father as he pointed at one of the shrooms, "Now you know why she likes gardening so much". AAARRGGG!!

* Posted by: Wendy_the_Pooh USDA 2003 z5/6 (My Page) on Wed, Jul 2, 03 at 0:18

Oh, my, is that funny, flytoxin. Glad I was awake for that story. Hee-hee-hee!

* Posted by: Veronicastrum z5 IL (My Page) on Wed, Jul 2, 03 at 8:57

flytoxin, I will "witness" for you that you're not exaggerating - I had a nice "set" pop up in my own yard last summer. Thank heavens it was only my 14-year-old niece who commented on how interesting the mushrooms were.

And by the way, I think your SO has the same sense of humor as my husband!

* Posted by: TinaMcG Z5 Chicago (My Page) on Wed, Jul 2, 03 at 13:01

Hey speaking of dog-barf fungus, aka slime mold....this is the first year I haven't had a problem with it. Last year was a nightmare. I don't care if it "doesn't do any harm". It was growing all over my perennials, and if I hit it with the hose, there were poofs of black spore-smoke all over the place. It was like a Hitchcock film in our garden.

Why don't I have slime mold this year? Well, the weather hasn't been that much different than in previous years, so I can only figure it's because I switched from hardwood bark mulch to a thick layer of shredded leaves.

* Posted by: flytoxin z6a NJ (My Page) on Wed, Jul 2, 03 at 17:17

Tina McG:

Could possibly be the change that did it. I do not use leaves as I found they created a slug problem for me. Dying material and a soft environment to slither over. They seem to resent the rougher texture. Last years chips were predominately maple which produced the serpent army, this year it's birch and it's crop are like the Japanese Shitaki mushrooms. Birch chips are my favorite as they smell great (just don't work with them too long after freshly being cut as you can actually be overcome by the fumes, smells like being in a giant soda factory). Like other chips they will dry out but a rain will bring on the fragrance again. I also find that the insect level seems to decrease in the beds when I use them. (Unfortunately I'm at the mercy of whatever is on the trucks when they come home and many times it's something else).

* Posted by: littlebug5 z5 MO (My Page) on Wed, Jul 2, 03 at 17:38

Still laughing at flytoxin's anatomically correct shrooms.

Well, I had a heebie-jeebie, and I still have chills up my back just remembering it:

I was home alone, mowing my yard on my big noisy riding mower. On the side of my house, near the woods, I was mowing along when I caught a movement out of the corner of my eye. I turned around on the seat and just caught the sight of a BIG blacksnake disappearing into the woods. About 4 FEET of him!!!! Well, I am a snake-phobic. I just about had a heart attack. Then, I thought, well, I can't let him get away! So I stopped the mower, went around to the garage to get the hoe, and come back looking for him. Well, I saw him all right. He raised his head up out of the weeds under the trees, looked at me, then KEPT RAISING UP OUT OF THE WEEDS TO A HEIGHT OF ABOUT 4 FOOT AND CLIMBED A TREE!!!! He stretched out along the branch that hung over my yard. About 6 Feet long! AAAAUGGGHHHH!

So, methinks, I'll get you yet! So I go back to the garage to get my son's .22 and some shells. So I come back to shoot him and he's gone. Naturally!

So, after I calmed down a little bit, I got back on my mower to finish the yard. (Hang with me here.) I had to mow under that branch, several times, and each time I was craning my neck to make sure he wasn't up there and ready to fall down on me.

Unbeknownest to me, DH and DS (who is 13) returned home. DS brought me a cold pop (how sweet, you think). Well, he thought he would be clever and sneak up behind me and surprise me with it.

Well, you guessed it. As I was making a pass under that fateful branch, DS tapped me on the shoulder. I thought I was going to die! As we say in Missouri, I nearly "had a cow." I screamed, I cried, I nearly wet my pants.

DS thought it was extremely funny. And we haven't seen the snake since.

* Posted by: Chris_ont 4-5 Ont (My Page) on Sat, Jul 5, 03 at 22:54

Littlebug, I can only say I'm glad you didn't still have that gun when your DS startled you!

I had a moment today.
There was this thing on my crocosmia. Round, grey, pea-size and shape. In some sort of web. I figured it for an egg or eggs of some sort. Because I can't leave well enough alone, I used my finger to poke at the very edge of the web, to see if it was a spider with its legs pulled in or something.

SPROINGGGGGG. The thing took a gigantic leap, hit my finger (I think) and disappeared. It was just gone. I never even saw what it was.

Of course, I was convinced that it landed somewhere on me. I ran in the house, removed all of my clothes and shook them out. I'm STILL convinced it's in my hair or something.

I never learn...

* Posted by: Taryn S Ontario Z6B (My Page) on Sun, Jul 6, 03 at 1:17

flytoxin, ROTHLMAO, hehehe! Hope the MIL loosened up some after her 'encounter' with the 'mushrooms' hehehe!

* Posted by: Radagast US east coast (My Page) on Sun, Jul 6, 03 at 15:35

Here's a few, and yes, I am a guy, so you can snicker if you want to...

--- The Medusa Pine: This one happened a bunch of years ago back when I was in college. My family has a modest-sized pine bush on the east side of the house.

Well, one day I was out there trimming the grass or mowing it or something, and I kept hearing a rustling sound... I turned around and my eyes wided in horror at the pine bush.

The whole thing was covered with pinesaw worms (or something like that) - these long, green caterpiller like things would cover the stems and sorta blend in, but they'd all squirm and wriggle at the same time.

The result was as if the whole plant was a Medusa - a slithering, ghastly mass of snake-like worms. HORRID!!

Fortunately, a good dose of insecticide kills the dang things, but it was a pretty revolting sight to see. You just don't expect to see that many bugs on a plant, and they were all green so they blended in... until they moved...

--- Spiders: Normally, I don't mind them, but there's a particular kind that I've seen around on the east coast that gets in houses now and then... it's large and black, and while not one of the dangerous, biting types, it is still nasty and bold. Unlike most spiders, if you try to crush it, it will jump at you, or run away with astounding speed. Just a real pain in the neck, especially when they jump off walls and such.

--- Mushrooms: I just hate mushrooms. I don't know why, exactly, though my family always had a problem with mushrooms and gross toadstools growing in the soggy, shady area of the yard near the drainage ditch. I just hate nearly all of them. They're nothing but decay, feeding upon death, and they have all sorts of gross and unnatural behavior... puffballs that unleash clouds of spores, bloated, revolting mushrooms that kill all the grass around them, etc... and the big ones STINK! when cut with a lawnmower or whatever. UGH!!

* Posted by: odonata_va z7-8VA (My Page) on Sun, Jul 6, 03 at 16:17

I dont gross out over stuff but my husband does...

I was in the garden. My husband (who hates nature as much as it hates him) is complaining to me about the tomato plant I pulled out (virus) He is standing with his back to the bluebird house. I can see the house entrance over his shoulder. He is standing only a foot away. I see something move. I think "oh the baby birds are moving around in the box" (they were getting ready to fledge. At this point, everything goes to slow motion. The cute little baby bird sticks its head out of the box. But wait, The head is black and reptilian not blue and feathery. Interesting, I think, Should I interrupt my patronizing but oblivious husband and alert him to the fact that he is about to get up close and personal with Nature?....

Nah, Said blacksnake came shooting out of the box, landed on his neck and dropped down and got caught between his t shirt and under his armpit as he did the fourth of July blacksnake on your neck dance. Best strip act I have ever witnessed in my front, back and side yard, clothes all OVER the place. Said snake was released in the woods with my blessing and Said hubby retired to the house in his jockey shorts. Neighbor lady said she felt she should have tipped him five bucks. I told her he was good at it because in 14 years of marriage, this has been the 4th time that a snake has dropped down on his neck.

* Posted by: Wendy_the_Pooh USDA 2003 z5/6 (My Page) on Sun, Jul 6, 03 at 21:47

Chris_ont,

It's probably still in the house. Have you imagined lately (while you're half-asleep) that you've felt something crawling on you? :) I know, I'm bad...

* Posted by: Taryn S Ontario Z6B (My Page) on Sun, Jul 6, 03 at 23:11

odonata va, ROTHLMAO again! This is a very funny thread!

* Posted by: Vicky60 z5 WI ) on Wed, Jul 16, 03 at 13:41

Oh my. My co-workers must think I am crazy. These are hilarious. Thanks for sharing. I especially love the snake stories. I can fortunately say that I've never had a close encounter, but I can imagine that I would do the, as odonata called it, Fourth-of-July blacksnake down your neck dance. I just don't think they (snakes) have evolved yet.

* Posted by: Cris 6b RI (My Page) on Wed, Jul 16, 03 at 15:02

Maggots hands down. I was scarred as a 10 year old finding a dead rat in a heap of tack in our barn. <

Ticks come in a close second. There's nothing more gross than a tick. < I freak out if I find one of me....jumping around...screeching...the whole nine yards

* Posted by: Leslie6RI (My Page) on Wed, Jul 16, 03 at 16:18

I want to grow some of those mushrooms that flytoxin had. I don't know why...

And I've never been concerned in the least about moths. UNTIL NOW!

And I'm wondering what would happen if I dropped a snake on my husband's neck. Maybe I could charge the neighbors for the floor-show...

This has to be the funniest thread I've ever read.

* Posted by: momofthreeinzone4 Z4NY ) on Wed, Jul 16, 03 at 17:13

i got my son a bug catcher last year and he had a great time with it - he left it on the porch during the winter snow and when the snow thawed we found Cheez-its and the remains of a mouse in it.

* Posted by: flytoxin z6a NJ (My Page) on Wed, Jul 16, 03 at 18:36

Are we allowed another EEEWWW! story? Please, please, it's a bonafide one that I just remembered.

When my brother and I were young our little sister was a real pain in the ____. The type of kid that would sneak up behind you when you were watching TV, rip a hunk of hair out of the back of your head and then run and tell your parents you were beating on her. Which resulted in you getting smacked! Well one day when my brother and I were playing out in the front yard she was really harassing us so of course we started to chase her. She was so busy running while looking backwards that she had not realized she had cleared our property line and was now entering the neighbors. The neighbors with the really really big dogs.Well before you knew it she hit the biggest, juiciest, pile of St. Bernard's crap you ever saw. That poor dog must of had alot of grease that night as man was it loose. As soon as she hit it she went down like a baseball player sliding into home plate. Too this day I can still see it in slow mo in my mind. My brother and I started laughing so hard, she cried all the way home and we presented her to mom with us still laughing our butts off. What was mom's response? "Oh you think it's funny, well lets see how funny you think it is when you clean her up!" And we had to. EEEWWWWW!!! She stunk so bad! The hair on the one side of her head was slicked back like some greaser from the 50's, she even had it in her ears. Man it was horrible. My brother wanted to throw her in the pool but we remembered she still couldn't swim that good. Seriously we were pondering the thought but were afraid that if we had to fish her out in an emergency move we might not be able to get a good grip on her because she was so slippery. (Heh the minds of a 10 & an 11 yr old). We opted for the complete strip/garden hose technique as we were in enough hot water.

So if any of you ever cross paths with my little sister and she starts to get on your nerves just use this little question "Is it true your nickname as a kid was stinky?" To this day decades later we never let her live that one down.

* Posted by: BronwynsPetalPatch Z7/6b NJShore (My Page) on Sat, Jul 19, 03 at 1:38

Its so funny I found this post... I just went outside to 'right' my patio umbrella that fell over, table and all(had a rain storm) and stepped on a slug! :P Yik!!!!! (there really are no words to describe!) :O)

* Posted by: SunnyDay2day mid-MI. zone 5 (My Page) on Sat, Jul 19, 03 at 15:30

Man, you guys are hard on my bladder! Thanks 10 million for the many many ROFL laughs! I can't remember any heebie jeebies since I got a bloodsucker on my foot as a girl of about 10 or 11. Then it was my mother's turn to laugh till she cried when I did the help-I'm-dying-get-this-monster-off-my-foot-can't-you-seeI'm-hysterical dance. Talk about disgusting...they rank right up there with maggots!

* Posted by: Meig z5a IL (My Page) on Sat, Jul 19, 03 at 16:09

Most of these stories make me want to run and take a shower...my skin literally itches thinking about some of it...bleh!

Others are making me laugh so hard I am crying.

* Posted by: cadence 8b (My Page) on Sat, Jul 19, 03 at 17:50

You all have literally got me paranoid now. I just poured myself a nice cold coke and when I put the glass up to my lips, I stopped dead cold. Had to look into the glass first. LOL

* Posted by: Yondertree Oregon coast (My Page) on Sat, Jul 19, 03 at 22:32

Yikes, I don't know whether to laugh or cry, like the time I was standing out in front of the place I work, talking to my boss, and a seagull dumped all over the shoulder of my coat. I never saw him laugh so hard, sadistic fellow, but it was one joke I couldn't laugh at.

But this one still gives me chills: Once out in the garden, bending over, I felt a light touch of something softly running up my back. I looked up to see a hawk flying away, with a recently caught ground squirrel dangling from his talons! He was having trouble making his altitude fast enough, and that squirrel tail had brushed along my spine.

* Posted by: Cleo1 6b (My Page) on Sat, Jul 19, 03 at 23:33

I always leave a 2 foot pail on the side of the house to collect weeds/garden cuttings. I threw stuff in the pail a few weeks ago and a mouse jumped up about a foot from inside the pail. Nearly gave me a heart attack. While I was pondering how it got in there and what I was going to do about it, my husband came home (HEHEHE). Told him I had a problem with my garden pail and stood back. It's ok, he does not have a heart problem, at least not that I know of. LOL... I never throw anything in the pail now without peeking first.

* Posted by: sowngrow 8 (My Page) on Sun, Jul 20, 03 at 0:14

Wow-I'm sitting here with my feet on the rung of my desk chair (don't know what might crawl over them) laughing 'til I'm crying. I was intermittently feeling like I have something crawling on me and then scratching my arms during the entire thread!
flytoxin you are TOO much!
And Sandra, I have a frog phobia also. Of course people don't take that seriously when they are told. One day a neighbor boy who knew full well of my phobia, actually threw a frog, as hard as he could, at me while he stood in the street and I stood by my garage talking to his mother.
Fortunately for me and that da*# kid, the frog missed me.

* Posted by: butterbeanbaby z5 MO (My Page) on Sun, Jul 20, 03 at 9:07

Oh my God, y'all need to put a disclaimer on this "Do Not Read While Pregnant"... I'm laughing so hard my eyes are running, my four year old thinks I've lost it, my skin is crawling, I can't breathe and either my water just broke or I may have wet my pants!!!!!

I can't read about flytoxin's sister or odonata's hubby's blacksnake boogie again or I'll have to go to the hospital for sure!

My hubby goes absolutely bezerk if he sees a wasp... big ol' 250 lb man doing the heebie jeebie dance, then he grabs a shoe and dances around practicing killing it for about ten minutes, hits the wall and the floor and the furniture before I get tired of watching and walk up and smack it for him. He also tries to kill wolf spiders with the hammer. City raised apartment boy LOL.

Not long after we moved to MO from CA, our cat was sitting behind the TV one day just hissing her brains out... hubby and I were both going "what the *heck* is wrong with that stuipd cat" so I looked back there... big ol' grass spider had cornered my 14 lbs kitty and she couldn't get away.

Anything to do with maggots or snakes is bad enough, but those *gigantic* Missouri slugs pretty much do me in. First time I saw one I started screaming "SNAKE SNAKE" at my hubby. Those suckers are so big, you can't step on them. I can't even bring myself to salt them they so nasty.

I need to go take a shower!

* Posted by: prussell z6 TN (My Page) on Sun, Jul 20, 03 at 17:31

why, oh why, has no one mentioned possums yet?!

* Posted by: odonata_va z7-8VA (My Page) on Sun, Jul 20, 03 at 19:59

Possums? live ones, dead ones or ones playing dead?

* Posted by: odonata_va z7-8VA (My Page) on Sun, Jul 20, 03 at 20:24

I think I?m going to charge admission to the greatest show on earth.... My husband against the world of nature... I?m going to take him out in the woods, release him and then film his epic and panic filled run back to civilization... I kid you not, the gods of nature hate this man... What follows are true accounts:

6 mind you 6 counts of blood poisoning in 14 years from mosquito bites.

Snake falls off the top of the screen door onto his neck.
Snake falls out of a tree onto his neck Snake pretends to be a garden hose and gets picked up Snake lands on neck from birdhouse

9 snakes + 1 log + 1 stuuuuck canoe on log + two newlyweds (the male newlywed is rocking the canoe and the log and the snakes and screaming I quote "I SHOULD HAVE NEVER MARRIED YOU! YOU SHOULD HAVE MARRIED A PARK RANGER!)= Everyone in the water including 9 snakes. (Ever seen someone levitate before?)

Beaver attacks boat, but only stern of boat where husband sits. (He wouldn?t let me steer the boat anymore once he figured out I steer towards the snakes)

Husband on hike goes to pee off the side of the trail into a ditch and a deer runs out of the woods and knocks him over.

Mountain lion follows us up trail

Mountain lion follows us down the trail until a BEAR shows up.

Tiger swallowtails at a 'puddle club' fly up and circle his head and manage to stick a butterfly foot into his eye.. you guessed it, eye becomes infected.

He bought me walkie talkies for Christmas so we can stay in contact.........

* Posted by: flytoxin z6a NJ (My Page) on Sun, Jul 20, 03 at 21:57

To Sowngrow: My oldest son was a small creature collector and had a habit of sticking them in his pockets and forgetting to take them out once he got home. Bet you didn't know that the majority of frogs can't make it through the laundry from start to finish. The rpms in the spin cycle literally rips them apart. Found that out a few times. Totally gross! Although tree frogs are a bit more durable wash wise, it's the dryer that finishes them off! You find them shrink wrapped like some ancient Colorform on the drum wall (and they don't peel off easy). It was the gifts from my son that finally taught me to check pockets before doing a load.

To odonata: Put that poor husband of yours in a bubble, he's been through enough.

* Posted by: lavatera 5/chgo (My Page) on Mon, Jul 21, 03 at 11:03

What a relief to read about so many others that have similar heebie jeebie triggers despite wanting to be outdoorsy or even gardeners!

It was especially a relief after having spent yesterday morning at my sister-in-law's, in her fabulous garden as she casually picked off beetles from various rose bushes and other plants and proceeded to smash or vivisect them in her BARE HANDS! EEEWWW! And she was doing it like it was nothing. Of course so many times I've read gardening experts say that before you resort to using chemicals you should try the hand pick method. But besides her, I've never actually SEEN someone doing it and with such gusto.

I stop at using a hose and then I just give up on an infestation figuring que sera, sera....

* Posted by: Chris_ont 5a Ont (My Page) on Mon, Jul 21, 03 at 11:16

So I'm happily dead-heading this morning. The earth smells heavenly after this rain, the robins are following me around hoping I'd unearth a worm or two, hum, whistle, happy sigh, pretty pretty garden.

Clipping some damaged violet leaves, I put my finger into something squishy and fluffy. Poked it right into a big clump of spider eggs in the process of hatching. My hand was instantly covered in tiny baby spiders.

I now know why dogs roll on the ground when they've encountered something unpleasant.

* Posted by: Talamorgan z6 PA (My Page) on Mon, Jul 21, 03 at 12:08

Chris_ont, I would have DIED right there on the spot. I am absolutely terrified of spiders!

* Posted by: ccsuzy z6 IN (My Page) on Mon, Jul 21, 03 at 12:15

Yesterday I walked out in the yard and was standing looking at our new backdoor and realized my foot was becoming covered in ants. Last night after turning off the hose (which the teenagers left on the day before when washing the car) I was sitting on the couch and tried to swat the fly on my leg - it was a slug, YUCK. Then this morning I found a reddish black thing on the back of my arm that looked like a scab, rubbed it and it stood up on end, yep, it was a tick....

* Posted by: Wild4Gardens 6 PA (My Page) on Mon, Jul 21, 03 at 17:36

OMIGOD, Odonata.. I am crying from laughing so loud!

* Posted by: wingnutdad620 z6 RI (My Page) on Mon, Jul 21, 03 at 20:18

Ok, no funny story to go with this one but those BIG PINK YUCKY IRIS BORERS ARE GROSS!

* Posted by: Triple_Creek z5 (My Page) on Mon, Jul 21, 03 at 21:23

Some of you people are just to funny. Thanks for the laughs. My garden Heebie Jeebies has to do with snakes. I used to be terrified of them, but since we built our house in the middle of 50 mostly wooded acres, I figure they were here first and am trying to cope. I can handle most of them but when it comes to the poisonous copperheads I draw the line. One day i decided to divide a daylily that had ajuga growing all around it and reached down to pull some of it back so I could see what I was doing. Well I guess the little copperhead under there thought I was trying to pick him up, and it bit me on the left pinkie.(they are poisonous) Can you say PANIC!
Since I was home alone, I called the nearest neighbor. She said she would take me to the ER , but since her little ones were asleep, I decided to drive myself to where my DH was working not knowing if I was going to get sick or what. He took me on to the ER. I didn't die . LOL, just had to get a tetanus shot and had a swollen and painful hand for about a week. So I figure I can survive a bite but I still don't like them. This summer I was in the garden with my dog Keebler ( named for the Keebler Elves because he was a stray born in a hollow tree). Anyway, he gives his ?someone is here? bark but with a low growl at the end, so I come to check it out and there is a LARGE Shiny copperhead on the front walk. I went to get the hoe and when I got back I couldn't see it, but figured it went under the bush next to the walk. Couldn't flush it out with the hoe, so went for the 22. Still couldn't see it but shot into the bush anyway. It pops it head out and I shoot it. Sure I killed it with the first shot. But since snakes have a habit of wiggling for a while after they are dead. I target practiced for a while. When I related the snake story to my DH, he asked if I shot it in the head. My reply was, yes and everywhere else. He chuckled. I know they are gods creatures too, I just don't like them in such close proximity.

* Posted by: ernie50 z7bGA (My Page) on Tue, Jul 22, 03 at 6:58

There's something admirable about a woman who shoots her own snakes. Kudos TC(and Keebler)!

* Posted by Alex_z7 7 AL (My Page) on Tue, Jun 29, 04 at 11:43

Somehow, while doing a search on the whole site last night, the FAQ Gardening Heebie Jeebies showed up. It didn't have what I was searching for, but I can't tell you the last time I laughed that hard.

I was telling my h about it when we got into bed last night, and I kept telling him stories as I remembered them. We were lying there, only 1 lamp on across the room, peacefully giggling about the creepies in the stories when suddenly something small jumps up and is flying for us on the bed! I screamed and yanked the covers up, trying to fend the creature off......

Just then I realized it had made a noise just before landing on my husband. Gee, it sounded like our cat.

Now, our cat is not allowed in our bedroom because of my allergies. She has the upstairs of the house to herself and our big dogs have the downstairs. (She hates them. They love her and don't understand why she doesn't like them.) But she apparently gets lonely and feels left out so she crept across the living room and was sneaking into our bedroom. Once we finished laughing hysterically, I told her she needed to announce her presence BEFORE jumping on the bed like that. No response. I called her and cooed for her, no kitty.

She had been so scared by my screaming that she had turned and run back through the living room (dog territory) and back upstairs! My h went to check on her and she huffily informed him that she was not amused, that she had lost one of her 9 lives to my scream, and that she was NOT going to grace us w/ her presence again tonight.

Of course, tomorrow is another day.....